Star Wars loteria cards: Just the mashup you were looking for

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Artist Chepo Peña was inspired by Mexican loteria cards and George Lucas’ Star Wars to create these graphics. George Lucas said thanks, Chepa, but don’t sell them.  So he stopped selling them but still keeps them on the Internets. There’s more info over at the TextMex blog (by our amigo Memo Nericcio) and Chepo Peña’s site is here.

Mas…Star Wars loteria cards: Just the mashup you were looking for

Al Madrigal dives into the Tea Party’s manatee manifesto (video)

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President Bronco Bama might have been reelected, but that doesn’t mean the Tea Party is ready to give up. In Florida, they’re trying to keep the Socialist UN-Occupied Federal Government out of their water sports, insisting on their Constitutional Right to Ride Manatees.

The Daily Show’s Al Madrigal dives deep into the depths of Florida to meet the manatees, the manatee people and the Tea Partiers fighting for their right to party with these large, fully aquatic, mostly herbivorous marine mammals, which are sometimes known as sea cows. And monkeys riding dogs. [Disclosure: Al is also POCHO’s Migrant editor, and we’re so proud!]

PNS*Hot*Flash: Chinese hackers infected laptop, local man says

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(PNS reporting from TRENTON) “Chinese hackers infected my laptop and filled it with pornography,” an area beer sales executive told company help desk personnel yesterday. “I had no idea they could do that!”

Mark Mendoza, chief marketing officer for Buckman Brothers Beverages, said his company-issued Lenovo ThinkPad T530, a 15.6” powerhouse equipped with high productivity features and leading wireless options that keep him powered and unplugged around the clock, started acting strangely after a trip to CraftBrewCon2013 in Tallahassee last week.

Mas…PNS*Hot*Flash: Chinese hackers infected laptop, local man says

Is that an ironic ‘hipster’ mustache or a real bigote? (video)

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Mustaches are everywhere, and sometimes it’s hard to tell if that guy’s mustache over there at the bar or the bigotes on those women at the table in the back are for real or merely ironic affectations. This handy how-to guide will help you distinguish the posers from the sincerely hairy.

Free medical marijuana tamales? ‘Take A Hit’! (NSFW video)

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In Garden Grove, a nice city in Orange County, qualified patients of the ABC Marijuana Cooperative can get free mota tamales on Fridays, according to Gustavo ¡Ask A Mexican! Arellano. The traditional delicacies come in chicken, cheese and pork varieties, and the pineapple tamales pack the extra miracle ingredient of cannabis.

North of Rancho Pocho, up in Oxnard, Ventura County, the Earthquake Institute shines the spotlight on the forces opposing pot legalization and suggests alternatives in Take A Hit. (NSFW.)

Mas…Free medical marijuana tamales? ‘Take A Hit’! (NSFW video)

PNS*Hot*Flash: Mexico fights bird flu outbreak with drones

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(PNS reporting from GUANAJUATO, MEXICO) Mexican corporate chicken farms are fighting the bird flu outbreak in the central state of Guanajuato with specially-equipped drones, PNS has learned.

Over 582,000 chickens infected with avian influenza will be killed robotically by Depredadors, a Mexico-only model of the well-known American Predator drone.

The Depredador (photo) runs on high octane aviation fuel made only from sugar cane; the domestic Predators rely on high-fructose corn syrup.

“We’re taking every precaution not to kill innocent civilian chickens,” a spokesman for Industrias Bachoco SAB, Mexico’s biggest chicken producer told PNS Monday, “but shit happens, no?”

Mas…PNS*Hot*Flash: Mexico fights bird flu outbreak with drones

LAPD finds Christopher Dorner wallet at Russian meteor crash site

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(PNS reporting from LOS ANGELES) Fugitive ex-cop Christopher Dorner’s wallet was found at the Russian meteor crash site, according to an LAPD statement issued here today.

Although the Los Angeles Police Department does not have an explanation for how the charred wallet ended up on the meteor, observers note the theory supports the “Magic Wallet” theory the LAPD is using to explain how Dorner’s wallet and ID were simultaneously found on a boat in San Diego, at the San Ysidro border and intact in the ashes of the burned out cabin at Big Bear.

Mas…LAPD finds Christopher Dorner wallet at Russian meteor crash site

PNS*Hot*Flash: Yucatán prays for Russia after meteor

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(PNS reporting from MEXICO) This just in: The Yucatán Peninsula is sending thoughts and prayers to the people of the Ural Mountains of Russia impacted by today’s meteorite. “Sixty-six million years ago, one of those pinche asteroids hit me and killed my dinosaurs,” Yucatan told reporters at a hastily-called press conference.  “I am still upset about it.” The Yucatán Peninsula is planning a concert with Juanes and Pitbull to raise funds for the Russian people.

Mas…PNS*Hot*Flash: Yucatán prays for Russia after meteor

Surveillance video: Havana car thieves jack sweet Italian ride

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It’s hard to make a living as a Communist car thief in the Republic of Cuba; there aren’t many cars worth stealing. But every once in a while a hard-working Marxist-Leninist scores a sweet European import, like this stylin’ Fiat. And don’t worry about hot-wiring the ignition, either, Comrade. From each according to his ability; to each according to his need.

Mas…Surveillance video: Havana car thieves jack sweet Italian ride

The Pocho Ocho worst Valentine’s Day gifts evah?

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8. Candy Bra: Lets face it, dude, the gift wasn’t really for your girl — it was for your own enjoyment. If eating chalky conversation hearts is what turns you on, you might as well just give her one. Plus, you could have thrown it on her body when she was naked. Now you just wasted $14.95 instead of Brachs conversation hearts which are 99 cents.

7. Humidifer: Don’t buy shit just because it’s on sale, unless he or she has severe allergies. Do not let yourself look like a mouth breather.

6. Electric Blanket: I know, I know, I actually got this as a gift on Valentine’s Day. He explained that because he had a Jeep I should take it along when we go out. Shortly after the relationship ended, the blanket ended as well when my niece spilled her Dora the Explorer juice box all over it.

Mas…The Pocho Ocho worst Valentine’s Day gifts evah?

Grad student realizes lesbian tendencies don’t make her Frida Kahlo

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(PNS reporting from EAST LOS ANGELES)  María de Luz Guzmán Villa had a disturbing realization this week: being a lesbian in grad school does not make her more like the Mexican icon Frida Kahlo.

Like many others, Guzmán Villa first experimented with trying to be like Frida, especially her lesbian tendencies, after her first Intro to Chicano Studies course at Cal State L.A.

But instead of giving up her fascination upon graduation, she gave up her boyfriend César and applied to grad school.

Mas…Grad student realizes lesbian tendencies don’t make her Frida Kahlo

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