When Jan Brewja, governor of the Hate State of Arizona (photo,right), officially announced her absence from the jurisdiction, concerned Americans began a desperate search for LOST GOV, posting flyers on telephone polls and all over the Internets.
Her mysterious disappearance almost overshadowed the shocking revelation of Iowa’s Brian Peterson, who finally had to come to grips with the fact that he watches telenovelas for the boobs, not to learn Spanish like he originally told himself.
And in San Diego, a multimillionaire commissioned a billboard to get himself a new girlfriend for Christmas — a “Christmas Latina.” Our Especial Correspondents uncovered some earlier versions of the billboard, and an intrepid photographer snapped the final version of the message.
Here are the links to the top stories that broke the ñews:
- Realization: Man watches telenovelas for boobs, not to learn Spanish
- Lost Governor! Please print and share!
- UPDATED: San Diego multimillionaire’s Pocho Ocho rejected billboards
- Student activist confesses: ‘I’m actually mestizo, not indígena’
- The Talking Dead: No Habla Zombie
- Homeboys show you how to make Chanukah potato latkes (NSFW video)
- Tía Chita: ‘It’s final! I’ve absolutely, positively made my last tamal!’
- Where in the &*+@# is Jan Brewer? The Pocho Ocho places…
- Mayans cooked their food with balls, archaeologists say
- Al Madrigal uncovers the plot to hook senior citizens on weed (video)
- Have you seen her? Search for LOST GOV takes it to the streets (photo)*
- I really, really hate Christmas and here’s why
- If you’re gonna be a tagger, at least do it right (video)
- La Cucaracha: Dear Santa – All I want for Christmas is… (toon)
- Ukraine’s top belly dancer vs Santana’s ‘Black Magic Woman’ (video)