A ordinary visit to an optometrist for The Eye Test turns out wrong. This one-minute video animation is a student film by Nuria Gonzalez Blanco. POCHO gives Nuria an A+.
New Kiko live Los Lobos video: ‘When the Circus Comes (to Town)’
Los Lobos? We say they’re the best Los Angeles band ever. Others dismiss them as just another band from East L.A. Either way, here they are in a just-released video, lamenting lost love live at the San Diego House of Blues in When the Circus Comes from the masterful Kiko album.
- More Los Lobos: One Time, One Night (in America)
Hey, Hollywood! Peep your next Pocho Ocho Latino TV blockbusters
In an effort to capture the growing Latino audience, Grammy-winning producer Emilio Estefan (better known for marrying Gloria Estafan), will be producing a Latino-themed TV drama. Estafan hopes to create a show that will attract a Latino audience without “demeaning roles.”
Good luck Emilio! There’s no better example of Latino pride than El Chavo del Ocho!
Here are our suggested top eight Latino-themed tv dramas:
8. Dos Mujeres, Un Doctor Who – A handsome Time Lord battles evil MIGRA robots while forced to choose between two sexy companions.
7. Frijole & Isles – (pero que? son patas?)
6. Mariachi Medium – A man has visions of violent crimes while playing the tuba in shiny pants.
Mas…Hey, Hollywood! Peep your next Pocho Ocho Latino TV blockbusters
Pat Robertson: Tropical storm is God’s warning to Godless God-mockers
(PNS reporting from VIRGINIA) Rev. Pat Robertson told viewers of his 700 Club last night that Tropical Storm Isaac’s assault on the GOP National Convention in Florida is a warning to sinners.
“You goddam shit-for-brains idiots better pay some goddam attention or our Lord and Savior is gonna whip your sorry asses,” Robertson said. “Do you douchebags really think Our Father Who Art In Heaven will let you get away with this shit?”
“Jesus is cheesed the fuck off!” he told the estimated one million viewers of his Christian Broadcasting Network religious talk show. “Our glorious vengeful God is as angry as a hornet in a henhouse. He’s up in Heaven high, saying, ‘You little pussies, you don’t hate the homos enough! You let ’em get married ‘n’ shit? You are slacking off. I will now drown you. Enjoy the flood, mothafuckas!'”
“I’m talking to you, bitches!” he added.
Mas…Pat Robertson: Tropical storm is God’s warning to Godless God-mockers
AZ Gov. Jan Brewer unwraps her roots in Guanajuato, MX (photo)
(PNS reporting from MEXICO) In a bid to rehabilitate her image with Latinos, Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer visits her old friends in Guanajuato, Mexico.
RELATED:
- Gov. Brewja’s Self-Deportation Pods
- Witchy, Bitchy Gov. Brewja curbs dreamers
- MR. POCHO has a message for Gov. Brewja
POCHO ÑEWS SERVICE PNS IS A WHOLLY-FICTITIOUS SUBSIDIARY OF POCHISMO INC., A CALIFORNIA CORPORATION, WHO IS A PERSON ACCORDING TO THE SUPREME COURT. DON’T ASK US, WE JUST WORK HERE.
Ñewsweek: Arizona racism? Thankfully, we have Jesus El Luchador
Arizona hate made POCHO headlines again this week; the Pocho Ocho crew came up with Pro Tips for white-collar Latinos plus eight caveats for goofy gabachos; and while AZ Gov. Jan Brewja haunted POCHO, Jesus Christos El Luchador (who drinks Corona with a lime, btw) made a miraculous appearance.
These big stories broke the ñews on POCHO this week:
Mas…Ñewsweek: Arizona racism? Thankfully, we have Jesus El Luchador
When the going gets loco, locos turn pro: ‘Roberto’s Dreams’ (video)
Roberto’s Dreams comes straight from today’s headlines. Roberto has been laid off, Angelica cleans houses to make ends meet and 10-year-old daughter Brittany struggles to reconcile her Latino roots and her American education. Roberto opts for the American Dream of being his own jefe and decides to start his own business: The first Latino green cleaning business in North Carolina.
Comic Luke Torres loves La Gente: ‘Mexicans 101’ (video)
Stand-up comedian Luke Torres loves his family and his gente. Does his family seem like yours?
Romney gets especial love at El Palacio de los Jugos in Miami (video)
When GOP nominee wannabe Mitt Romney visited El Palacio de los Jugos in Miami earlier this month, he was greeted by the owner, a convicted Koch coke dealer, and an excited, vocal crowd. Angel Reyes was there and shot this video.
Son of immigrants takes the oath to become a ‘Pinche Migra’
(PNS reporting from EL PASO) The smell of grilled cebollas greeted visitors to a carne asada party in the back yard of the Lopez home in El Paso’s lower valley Saturday evening, as the family celebrated the graduation of the Lopez family’s prodigal son as a “Pinche Migra.”
José “Johnny” Marrufo completed the 58-day course at the United States Customs and Border Protection’s Border Patrol Academy located in Artesia, NM in July.
He graduated as a Border Patrol Agent and is now ready to detain his Mexican brethren.
“I feel happy that I will protect our border from terrorists and criminal aliens, some of whom are my relatives” the former Riverside High School third baseman told PNS.
Mas…Son of immigrants takes the oath to become a ‘Pinche Migra’
SNL’s Amy Poehler champions the rights of domestic workers (video)
Funny former Saturday Night Live comedian Amy Poehler is down for Domestic Workers, and comes clean on something not many in the U.S. will admit:
She could not be the busy actress and mom that she is without her hard-working domestic help.
Poehler’s Public Service Announcement (PSA) is a call to action to petition to California Gov. Jerry Brown get him to sign the California Domestic Worker Bill of Rights. Our moms and tias and abuelas have worked hard for years and deserve humane and equitable treatment afforded to others.
You can support the California Domestic Worker Bill of Rights by calling your state senator and Gov. Brown (916-445-2841) today. To learn mas, please visit www.domesticworkers.org.
Mas…SNL’s Amy Poehler champions the rights of domestic workers (video)
The City of Anaheim is a theme park where the theme is racism
In the land of make believe, the home of the Magic Kingdom, right where Disneyland sits, there is another theme park that has been around for decades.
This park is not called California Adventure, and its newest attraction is not “Cars.”
The amusement park is called simply “Anaheim.” Here, in various themed areas, you can have a magical time!
In Barriotown you can corral cast members, (AKA Mexicans) and watch them squirm in their low-income housing and run about their underserved public facilities. The best part is the Mexicans have no say in this! And the park management has no plans to do anything drastic to revamp or update this themed area by changing to City Council districts where the Mexicans may get to complain.
Mas…The City of Anaheim is a theme park where the theme is racism
Perspective: UN adds Salma Hayek’s breasts to world heritage list
[Editor’s Note: With all the attention Salma Hayek’s been getting about pride in her Mexican heritage or lack thereof, POCHO wants to put things in perspective. This story first appeared on June 4.]
(PNS reporting from GENEVA) The U.N.’s Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization (UNESCO) has added Salma Hayek’s breasts to the official list of the world’s greatest cultural assets.
Joining the Pyramids in Egypt, the Eiffel Tower in France, the Taj Mahal in India and the Great Wall of China, the Mexican-American actresses’ ample bosom is now acclaimed as one of the great “Cultural Wonders of the World.”
Mas…Perspective: UN adds Salma Hayek’s breasts to world heritage list
Tampa’s gay hookers ready for Republican Convention (NSFW video)
There’s going to be hot time in Tampa Bay next week when the GOP National Convention rolls into town. Republicans, who like to be seen as “job creators,” are expected to stimulate a long and thick boost in business for area gay prostitutes, and the hookers are looking forward to handling the hanging chads of closeted delegates. (Totally NSFW language.)
Pocho Ocho worst ways to get your finances back on track
8. Hydrox: Same as Oreos.
7. It makes good financial sense to invest in a
6. Wireless Internet? Wonderful. Neighbor’s WiFi? Priceless!
Mas…Pocho Ocho worst ways to get your finances back on track
Jan Brewja: Save time, hassle with the Self-Deportation Station (video)
All real Arizonans know it’s a pain in the AZ to racially-profile, harass, arrest and then deport people who look different from you! That’s why Gov. Jan Brewer is pleased to announce her automagic, high-tech, made-in-America, job-creating final solution for all those damn Mexicans.
Inspired by pioneering self-deportationist Daniel D. Portado, Brewja is introducing nifty new Self-Deportation Stations that make racism look quick, easy and clean.
- Craving more news from The Hate State of Arizona? Click here!
Jesus Christos and His 12 Apostle-Luchadores: ‘The Last Fiesta’ (toons)
Jesus drinks Corona, of course, and tacos, taquitos and burritos are on the menu in this painting of the Last Fiesta by Pale Horse, a fine art illustrator. Who is that drinking Tecate?
Pale Horse writes:
The Last Fiesta’ is my 12-skateboard deck shout-out to Leonardo da Vinci’s ‘The Last Supper’ with Jesus Christos and his 12 Luchador apostles getting down one last time. This piece was created for my solo exhibit Saints & Sinners, here at the Pale Horse Studio. Hand-made shadow box by Casey Paquet.
Mas…Jesus Christos and His 12 Apostle-Luchadores: ‘The Last Fiesta’ (toons)
Pocho Ocho best definitions in the new ‘Republican Dictionary’
Hoping to capitalize on the enormous groundswell of support they’ve generated with their new definitions of life, marriage and assault weapons, the GOP braintrust is planning to premiere a Republican Dictionary at next week’s convention in Tampa, FLA.
We got a brief peek at a draft (the “rape” definition was leaked Monday); check out the Pocho Ocho best definitions:
8. Rape: When a man loves a woman
7. Voting: What white people get to do
6. Minorities: Three-fifths of a person
Mas…Pocho Ocho best definitions in the new ‘Republican Dictionary’
GOP’s Akin to release childrens’ book on babies
(PNS reporting from MISSOURI) Rep. (and Senatorial hopeful) Todd Akin (R-MO) intends to write and publish a children’s book that explains to kids how babies are made, according to his staff.
The colorful How Non-Forcible Rape Babies Are Made explains Akin’s understanding of how the human reproductive system works in clear, simple language and bright illustrations especially written for Tea Party Republican voters who approve of his recent comments on rape and pregnancy.
The touchy subject is elucidated in loving and religious detail:
When a rapist loves a mommy, Jesus reaches down from heaven and touches the mommy’s tummy and the miracle of life is created. The end.
Can you pick the REAL Gov. Jan Brewja out of a lineup? (photos)
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Concept and images courtesy our doubly-cooked amigos at TheDailyRefried.
Louis CK: ‘I came to America as a little Mexican boy’ (video)
As Seen on Conan: Comedian Louis CK was in Arizona (of course — where else?) when his driver started spewing some racist crap…
[Editor’s Note: Oh my! It looks like this video, which dates from January, is suddenly not kosher. Who knew? Our apologies to those of you who tuned in late. And to the thousands who did get to see it on POCHO before Big Brother came around — that was some funny stuff, eh?]
Campus life changes as Latino enrollment hits new levels
Latinos are now the largest minority group at four-year colleges in the U.S., according to analysis of U.S. Census Bureau data by the Pew Hispanic Center, and that means big changes on campuses across the country.
While Latinos have long dominated various educational institutions, especially cosmetology schools and East L.A. College, the influx of brown students has already had an affect on traditional university life.
Some colleges have considered updating the cap and gown, replacing them with sombreros and serapes from Mexico, and the Ivy League has floated a new name, “The Cilantro League,” for use if the Ancient Eight ever starts admitting more than 260 Latinos a year.
Mas…Campus life changes as Latino enrollment hits new levels
Calmate, guey! Pocho Ocho things NEVER to say to Chicanos
8. Are you Puerto Rican?
7. Wow, you don’t even have an accent!
6. Huh? You don’t know how to make tamales?
Mas…Calmate, guey! Pocho Ocho things NEVER to say to Chicanos
Comic Dennis Vargas: How to confuse white people (video)
Confusing white people is easy if you follow these handy tips from stand-up comedian Dennis Vargas.
Hot improv mob gets all wet Hermosa at Black Tie Beach Party (photos)
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Those intrepid improvisationalists from GuerillaLAImprov (photo, right) staged their Second Annual Black Tie Beach Party at Hermosa Beach Saturday, and POCHO amigo and ace photog Dan Cooke was there.
Black Tie Beach? Huh? You get all dressed up like you’re going to the prom and then you go swimming. What’s so hard to understand about that? Especially in this weather.
Peep these big versions of the shenanigans and check out the link to the complete Beach Tie Beach Party photo album:
Mas…Hot improv mob gets all wet Hermosa at Black Tie Beach Party (photos)
Ñewsweek: Driving while fluffy, yo quiero taxes, Pro Tips for Latinos
The Hate State of Arizona retained its leading position as the most anti-Latino state in the country as the witchy bitchy governor, Jan Brewer, decided that DREAMERS who apply for Deferred Action should be denied state service like drivers’ licenses.
Also in Arizona, husky humorist Gabriel Iglesias’ tour bus got pulled over for a papers check. In Texas, a humble farmworker released his income tax returns and asked GOP nominee wannabe Mitt Romney to do the same and POCHO offered Pro Tips for Latinos working in The Office.
These were the stories that broke the ñews this week:
Mas…Ñewsweek: Driving while fluffy, yo quiero taxes, Pro Tips for Latinos
Guns, drugs, a plane – three men on ‘La Cañada (The Cliff)’ [video]
La Cañada (The Cliff) A film by Carlo Corea. Spanish with English subtitles (Spanish dialog NSFW if people at work don’t like Spanish adult language.)
Emilio and Nicolás, two drug dealers, are filling up their private plane with packages of cocaine in the Mexican mountains when a peasant stumbles into their operation. The Indio asks for a ride to the other side of the cliff.
The decision divides Nico (the boss) and Emilio (his helper), who must face the consequences of their decisions.
Mas…Guns, drugs, a plane – three men on ‘La Cañada (The Cliff)’
Work in ‘The Office’? You need our Pocho Ocho Pro Tips for Latinos
8. Don’t wear your sombrero to the office — unless it’s casual sombrero Friday.
7. If you are going to speak in Spanish at the office, talk shit about your non-Spanish speaking co-workers.
6. Respond with “Yes, I am an immigrant” when your co-workers ask you where you are from. You don’t want to be rude and tell them you were actually born in Chicago, now do you?
Mas…Work in ‘The Office’? You need our Pocho Ocho Pro Tips for Latinos