Once upon a time there were two corn chips, friends. They used to play together at the school playground. One chip thought the other was not playing fair, and he told him. This is their story.
Give like your life depended on it: United Appeal for the Dead (video)
Dead Henry Gibson has a message for you on behalf on the United Appeal for the Dead: In the past year, over 800,000 Americans have died. Despite millions of dollars of research, death continues to be our nation’s number one killer.
2 Pochas Podcast: Adios, June — damn wedding bells! (audio)
Elise Roedenbeck and Sara Inés Calderón are happy June is over with all those damn weddings! But now the gays are back in play! What’s a modern single woman to do? [The podcast is at the bottom of this post after this list of oldies…]
Previously on the 2 Pochas Podcast:
Mas…2 Pochas Podcast: Adios, June — damn wedding bells! (audio)
Update: We made it through the hack attack but still need your help
This graphic shows how hackers overwhelmed the site one day last week. Those three “load” figures at the top should be close to “1.” All the “USERS” you see on Comic Seanz’s screen cap show our webserver software (Apache) trying to keep up with bullshit requests from evil hack robots.
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Can you donate $20 or $50 so we can make more ñews y satire? |
The hackers who overwhelmed our site are gone — for now. But we still need your help so we can beef up POCHO’s infrastructure. Money help.
- Bringing in security pro to sweep our site will cost at least $100 — and could cost more if she finds something.
- Updating our hosting package — now provided as a public service by our friends at Pixelgate.net — means more dinero — over $100 more each month.
- Upgrading our WordPress theme software (the recent upgrade left a slew of bugs we’re trying to iron out), is another hundred or so plus expensive web developers.
We don’t have the money to do this stuff — without you.
Mas…Update: We made it through the hack attack but still need your help
Elise Roedenbeck Filibusters: ‘How To Do the Wendy’ (video)
It’s not easy standing up for women’s rights in Texas, but the heroic filibuster by State Sen. Wendy Davis kept the GOP’s anti-abortion SB5 from passing Tuesday night. Our MiJA, Elise Roedenbeck, learned how to Do the Wendy for the camera. [Disclosure: The settlement agreement approved by the judge means we must stay at least 100 yards away from Ms. Roedenbeck, but we can still remind people that she is POCHO’s New Jack City Burro Jefe, Emeritus.]
Defense contractors on immigration bill: ‘Time to get a new Beemer’
(PNS reporting from WASHINGTON, DC) The Senate’s approval of a bipartisan “immigration reform” bill Thursday — a bill which Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) says will create “the most militarized border since the Berlin Wall” — has defense contractors talking, and drooling.
The hot topic? The untold millions of dollars that may become available if Uncle Sam gets serious about “security.”
It’s the inevitable transition, cynics say, from Eisenhower’s old-school military-industrial complex to the new Post-Millennial MIGRA-Industrial Complex. But government contractors and suppliers have a more nuanced view.
Mas…Defense contractors on immigration bill: ‘Time to get a new Beemer’
‘Boxing like a boss #Latina style’ by @SaraChicaD (Vine video)
Sara Inés Calderón, POCHO’s Subcommandanta del Ñews, gets her speed bag on. [If you click on the speaker icon in the top left corner of the Vine image, you will hear audio! It’s amazing! These kids today with the smartphones!]
PREVIOUSLY ON VINE:
Mas…‘Boxing like a boss #Latina style’ by @SaraChicaD (Vine video)
Big sound for small bucks with new iMex iPhone dock (video)
Why pay big money to get the big sound your music deserves? The new iMex iPhone or iPod dock is easy to assemble, does not need weird Ikea wrenches, and is fabricated from recyclable and easily-replaceable components available wherever Mexicans are served. Also available for Android! Sorry, Redmondites — a Windows 8 version has encountered difficulty with integration of the Clippy function, but look for a Win version in 2014.
Pocho Ocho things you should know now that Salvadorans > Cubans
People with roots in El Salvador may soon replace Cuban-Americans as the third-largest “Hispanic-origin group,” according to The Pew Research Center:
For more than 40 years, one rock-solid element of Hispanic demographics has been the relative ranking of the three largest Hispanic-origin groups: Mexicans have always been the largest by population, followed by Puerto Ricans and then Cubans.
But this may be changing. The Salvadoran population’s growth rate has been about double that of the Cuban population (33% versus 17%). As a result, the Salvadoran population is now poised to overtake the Cuban population in the next few years.
But what does this mean to me, you ask? Here are the Pocho Ocho things you should know about your new neighbors:
Mas…Pocho Ocho things you should know now that Salvadorans > Cubans
Don’t ask, don’t yell: Al Madrigal gets gay married (video)
We were as surprised as Mrs. Madrigal, but here it is on TV, The Daily Show with Jon Stewart but really John Oliver. Al Madrigal got gay married — after all, it’s the law! [Disclosure: For probation purposes, Madrigal is POCHO’s Migrant Editor.]
Online surge of Constitutional Law, Bible experts slows the Internets
(PNS reporting from SILICON VALLEY) The Internets slowed to a virtual crawl yesterday as millions of experts in Constitutional Law and The Holy Bible took to Twitter and Facebook to educate ignorant netizens about the God-hating freedom-attacking Supreme Court ruling on same-sex marriage.
“It was definitely a brownout, dude,” according to 18-year-old Jaime “Twitchy” Loftwich, who runs the worldwide computer network from the basement of his mom’s home in Palo Alto. “Hella load,” he emailed PNS. “I haven’t seen ping times like that since Kim Kardashian was rushed to Cedars-Sinai!”
Mas…Online surge of Constitutional Law, Bible experts slows the Internets
Worst chupacabra camera phone video ever surfaces in San Antonio
Really, people. You have to do better than filming mangy coyotes!
The REAL chupacabra, as everyone knows, looks more like this:
Mas…Worst chupacabra camera phone video ever surfaces in San Antonio
Breakfast with @SaraChicaD: Pan dulce in Highland Park (video)
Sara Inés Calderón — @SaraChicaD on Twitter — invites you to join her for breakfast in Highland Park. Care for a cafecito and some pan dulce? No photos! [This Vine video has sound. Click on the speaker icon in the top left of the image.]
Actors read Yelp reviews of US-Mexico border checkpoints (videos)
Yes, people really write Yelp reviews of border crossings. In this video, one of a series, Marsha Stephanie Blake reads Mona M.’s review of the Chula Vista Border Patrol station in San Diego.
In another border checkpoint Yelp video, Harris Doran reads Eric T.’s Yelp review of the San Ysidro border crossing in San Diego.:
Mas…Actors read Yelp reviews of US-Mexico border checkpoints (videos)
POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz explains himself (audio)
It’s Ray’s Podcast — from the Ciudad of Brotherly Love.
Mas…POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz explains himself (audio)
Texas legislators want to outlaw ‘looking too Mexican in public’
(PNS reporting from AUSTIN) The Texas Senate is currently considering a bill that would outlaw “looking too Mexican in public.”
Senate Bill 32 was introduced by senators from East and North Texas who say the law will celebrate American and Texas culture.
“Texas has a proud and long history of being American, or Texan, and that should be celebrated,” said Fort Worth area Republican Sen. Alice Boswell.
“It’s not like Texas was never Mexico, so why should Mexicans here be allowed to celebrate that culture?”
Mas…Texas legislators want to outlaw ‘looking too Mexican in public’
Accused rapist? Fugitive spy? Ask your travel agent to ‘Do Ecuador’
(PNS reporting from QUITO) You don’t have to be an accused rapist hiding from the Swedish police like Julian Assange or an alleged spy like Edward Snowden to consider asylum in the República del Ecuador.
That’s the message of the new Do Ecuador marketing campaign from Ecuador’s Ministry of Tourism, which was announced in this high-altitude capital city Monday.
“There are only 15 million of us here in a country that covers 109,000 square miles, so come on down!” gasping-for-breath State Secretary for Tourism Gandalfo Gordo explained between hits of oxygen at a press conference in the newly-remodeled Safe House Hotel, formerly El Motel Seis.
Mas…Accused rapist? Fugitive spy? Ask your travel agent to ‘Do Ecuador’
Warning: Is there a ‘house hippo’ living in your closet? (video)
They make their nests out of lost mittens and dryer lint, often in bedroom closets. Does your casa secretly harbor a house hippo?
Flash: ‘Foxy Farmworkers’ set for Fall premiere on Fox
(PNS reporting from HOLLYWOOD) Hoping to capitalize on the Devious Maids buzz, Fox will jump on the stereotypical Latino programming bandwagon with a new entry this fall called Foxy Farmworkers.
The show will follow a quirky group of “young, single and ready-to-mingle” Mexican farmworkers as they make their way from the impoverished US-Mexico border to fields in Washington, Oregon, Montana, Michigan.
Between backbreaking 14-16 hour days in the sun and working in the fields, the young men manage to get themselves into a world of trouble chasing after petite, white women in the towns they pass through, breaking hearts along the way.
Vintage 1968 anti-war video reborn: ‘Mickey Mouse In Vietnam’
This one-minute 1968 black and white short 16mm animation by Milton Glaser was thought to be lost, but it resurfaced a month ago. There are lots of versions floating around but we like this one with music.
Mickey is no stranger to controversy. Here are two recent Mouse-themed toons from POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz:
Mas…Vintage 1968 anti-war video reborn: ‘Mickey Mouse In Vietnam’
Coming soon to a theater near them: Navajo ‘Star Wars’ (NPR audio)
If you find yourself in the Navajo Nation (in Arizona) on July 3, you’re in the right place at the right time for a once-in-a-lifetime experience — the premiere of Star Wars, translated into Navajo.
The 1977 classic has been translated into many languages, and the latest effort is the brainchild of Manuelito Wheeler, director of the Navajo Nation Museum in Window Rock, Ariz.
“We needed a way to preserve our culture,” Wheeler tells NPR’s Robert Siegel. “Language is at the core of a culture. And I felt we needed a more contemporary way to reach not just young people but the population in general. And so, that’s when the idea of translating a major movie into the Navajo language came up.”
Here’s the NPR interview:
Spanglish with @wilw Wheaton: Today’s word is ‘pupacabras’ (Vine)
Wil and Anne Wheaton consider the correct pronunciation of the word for “chupacabra puppies.” [New to Vine? We are too! Click on the audio speaker icon in the top left corner of the image to hear Wil and Anne. You may have to hover your mouse over some magic spot to make icon appear; we’re not entirely sure.]
Attention Mexican voters: Morris el candigato is a freakin’ cat! (video)
Morris the cat is a write-in candidate for mayor in Xalapa, Veracruz, MX. He’s a candigato, get it?
MEXICO CITY — Fed up with politicians they call “rats,” a group of friends in the eastern Mexican city of Xalapa have put forward their ideal candidate for mayor: a cat named Morris.
Xalapa resident Sergio Chamorro, who adopted the cat in August, said the plan began as a joke between friends borne out of their frustration with the Veracruz state government over freedom of speech.
“Fed up of voting for rats? Vote for a cat,” reads one campaign poster featuring the black and white cat, using the Spanish “ratas” for rats and “gato” for Morris.
Mas…Attention Mexican voters: Morris el candigato is a freakin’ cat! (video)
Meet artist Abel Alejandre: He’s all about the cock fighting (video)
Los Angeles artist Abel Alejandre says he did a lot of fighting when he was a kid, so the fighting cock has become his alter ego. [Video by Eric Minh Swenson. Music by Josh Garcia.]
Animal Planet Latino launches controversial show ‘Devious Mermaids’
(PNS reporting from HOLLYWOOD) Animal Planet Latino will be premiering a new “documentary” series that has stirred the waters of controversy.
The new cable show, Devious Mermaids, will explore the lives of five captured Latina mermaids who live in a giant tank on display at a Florida aquatic park set in the fictional town of Orlando.
Critics of the show are disturbed by what they call misleading and unrealistic portrayal of Latinas.
They also are assailing creator Marc Cherry, charging that as a middle-aged landlubber, he is insensitive when it comes to interpreting the experience of Latina mermaids.
Mas…Animal Planet Latino launches controversial show ‘Devious Mermaids’
Sleeping with my husband, puta? I’ll throw you off a cliff (video)
In Peru, love hurts. Next step: Couples counseling?
GOP, Christians reach out to millennials: ‘Rappin’ for Jesus’
If the GOP has any future, it needs fresh blood, according to young Christian conservatives at a recent right-wing confab.
And reaching “Millenials” means communicating in the languages These Kids Today know — sarcasm, hiphop, humor and snark.
“How do you make abortion funny?” That was a key question mulled at a major conservative gathering Friday on how to make social conservatism appealing to young people, after an election where Republicans got trounced in the battle for millennial voters (who are are moving even further and further away from the Christian-right on marriage and other issues).
Mas…GOP, Christians reach out to millennials: ‘Rappin’ for Jesus’