Pocho Ocho signs that you are a renter

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Here at POCHO headquarters, not all of us own our own homes. As a matter of fact, some of us are the victims of less-than-concerned landlords. Oh, the joys of renting!

Here are the Pocho ocho signs that you’re renting:

8. Your towel rack is broken for weeks at a time and you have to hang your towel on the front stoop, which “brings down property values” but doesn’t lower your rent.

7. You can hear cats having sex on every side of your apartment complex in the middle of the night.

6. Toilets, showers and sinks occasionally overflow with water that smells funny.

Mas…Pocho Ocho signs that you are a renter

PNS*Hot*Flash: Chicana frets – winged eyebrows or eyeliner?

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(PNS reporting from EAST LOS ANGELES) Veronica Gonzalez has a conundrum: Should she go rockabilly and do winged eyeliner or go chola and do winged eyebrows?

“It’s, like, hard, you know? I’m just trying to keep up with my heritage,” Gonzalez told PNS Wednesday.

Gonzalez said that if she went rockabilly it would not only look cute with her new cats-eye glasses, but she would be able to dress more girly. If she went with the chola eyebrows, then she would have to wear more khaki and that’s just not her color.

Mas…PNS*Hot*Flash: Chicana frets – winged eyebrows or eyeliner?

A Latina’s Guide: How to talk to a racist

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As unfortunate a reality as it may be, one way or another in our country, you’re going to have to deal with someone who is racist, or at least holds a little bit of prejudice.

What’s even more unfortunate is that you’re most likely to come across someone who doesn’t necessarily know that they are prejudiced, and thus, pointing out this behavior or dealing with it may be a bit more difficult for you.

Now, say that you are a Latina and so have to deal with society’s sexist — as well as racist — attitudes and all of a sudden you find yourself in a bit of a bind. How does one fight The Man, preconceived notions of femininity (from both American and Latino cultures), civility standards, sexism and racism all at once?

I have a few tips that I thought might be useful, so here we go:

1. Don’t blow up

Mas…A Latina’s Guide: How to talk to a racist

Flowers that bloom in Bel-Air, tra la, need immigrant gardeners (fotos)

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Installation artist Ramiro Gomez — who makes invisible immigrant laborers visible by installing cardboard cutout painted figures around Los Angeles neighborhoods — emailed Tuesday evening:

My newest piece is in front of a home in Bel-Air. I drove around for a while looking for a place that felt right. At first I placed them in front of the Hotel Bel-Air (see below) but the sun was setting fast and it didn’t feel right, so I continued driving down the street and found this house. As I approached this home on Strada Corta Rd. near the Bel-Air Country Club, I was immediately drawn to the colorful spring flowers, the sun shining at the right spot and my instinct was to place them here.

If you could mention that my UCLA Chicano Studies Research Center show “Luxury, Interrupted” closes April 8th I would really appreciate it.

Mas…Flowers that bloom in Bel-Air, tra la, need immigrant gardeners (fotos)

Kelly Miller’s 35th birthday party in Bondi: To Mexico with love (video)

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Kelly Miller lives in Bondi, Australia, a suburb of Sydney, famous for Bondi Beach and “bondi blue,” a Steve Jobs iMac color.

Kelly has never been to Mexico and has no “Mexican heritage,” but she wants to visit. In February, she used Facebook to organize a “Made In Mexico” 35th birthday bash that somehow involved Bob Esponja. How did she do as a Mexican wannabe? (Don’t be hatin’ on her for the piñata mishap after all those jello shots.)

Mas…Kelly Miller’s 35th birthday party in Bondi: To Mexico with love (video)

AP’s Pocho Ocho dropped names beside ‘illegal immigrant’

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Associated Press (AP), the cooperative news service used by print, broadcast and online media, today dropped the term “illegal immigrant” from its stylebook:

‘Illegal immigrant’ no more
Posted on 04/02/2013 by Paul Colford
The AP Stylebook today is making some changes in how we describe people living in a country illegally.

Senior Vice President and Executive Editor Kathleen Carroll explains the thinking behind the decision:

The Stylebook no longer sanctions the term “illegal immigrant” or the use of “illegal” to describe a person. Instead, it tells users that “illegal” should describe only an action, such as living in or immigrating to a country illegally…. [Continued at AP]

But that’s not all! Here are the Pocho Ocho other designations dropped by AP:

8. Chancla-throwers

7. Elote-eaters

6. Paleta people

Mas…AP’s Pocho Ocho dropped names beside ‘illegal immigrant’

PNS*Hot*Flash: Alumni magazine gives Encino man the sad

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(PNS reporting from ENCINO) San Fernando Valley homeowner Donald Murietta was depressed most of   Saturday afternoon after reading the latest issue of The Pennsylvania Gazette, the alumni magazine of the University of Pennsylvania.

Murietta, a 1998 Penn graduate, first turned to the obituary section when the glossy monthly arrived with the 2PM mail delivery, and that’s when his ball-breaking downer began.

News of the February 12 death (a tragic fish-pickling accident in Rochester, NY) of old girlfriend Leslie Sonnenshein (nee Baldwin), Class of 1999, set off a cascade of emotions that started at the top with their intense makeout session at that SAE party after the Princeton game and ended at the bottom with a very public breakup in the Van Pelt Library right before Christmas, which was totally his fault because he fucked that girl Candi.

Mas…PNS*Hot*Flash: Alumni magazine gives Encino man the sad

It’s Cesar Chavez’s birthday, and Google threw a Doodle party

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Late Saturday night, as I searched for some historical images for a new history book I’m illustrating, I saw that Google had finally honored farm labor icon Cesar Chavez with their “Google Doodle.”

My first thought (and tweet) was, “Brace yourselves for anti-Mexican, anti-immigrant, anti-Cesar Chavez racist hate from internet Christians on their Holy Day.”  Faster than you could pull up a thousand images of the Mexican-American hero on Google Images, the harsh comments started rolling in.

As I called it, a few hateful internet Christians declared jihad on Google because it’s not a Jesus Christ Doodle or their main religious figure, the Easter Bunny (historical image below). 

Mas…It’s Cesar Chavez’s birthday, and Google threw a Doodle party

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: The Hipster Taco

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Hola. Is Tia Lencha here. Today I going to help you make my new faborite taco. The other day I saw my mijo making sonething in the kishen. I so proud. He like to cook like his mama.

I say, “Mijo, what you making?”

He say, “A taco.”

I see that he was using corn tortillas, crumble Oaxaca cheese, scramble eggs, salsa chipotle, and potato ships. I was confuse.

“Mijo, are ju putting ships in the tacos?”

“Yes.”

“Why you do that?”

“I ate one like this at the hipster taco trock” he say, looking like a little mouse that ate all of the cheese in the mouse trap and then runned away.

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: The Hipster Taco

Hey, wetbacks! Meet Rep. Don Young (R-AK) [audio]

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Meet Congressman Don Young, a Republican from Alaska, who just called agricultural laborers who once worked on his father’s ranch “wetbacks.”

In a radio interview Thursday with KRDB this fine American legislator was full of the kind of wisdom that has inspired the deep thoughts of his homegirl, Sarah Palin, and assorted white power NRA-voting posses, militias and tea parties across the U.S. of A.

A three-second clip is at the bottom of this story. Play it here or download it and make it into a ring tone, or an auto-tuned viral meme! Thanks to KRDB for the audio. Oh, and here are the phone numbers for all the Congressman’s offices.

Mas…Hey, wetbacks! Meet Rep. Don Young (R-AK)

Play ball! Five tips to survive Los Doyers 2013

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Baseball season starts Monday. For me, it means six months of praying and hoping that the Dodgers can turn their billion-dollar payroll into championship glory.

Those Dodger games can be expensive and explosive. There is nothing better than sitting through the United States’ answer to the soccer (including riots if you show up wearing the wrong cap.) So here is a guide to surviving your outing with Los Doyers.

TIP #1: Be prompt: The reason you want to be there is merely for seating. With the right kind of heart, you can treat the experience like an event with general admission. Do not get greedy.

If you have nosebleed ZZZ tickets, don’t try to sneak in to the A+ section behind luminary celebrities like Fred Savage or one of the Real Housewives. Row G is good enough. Most Dodger fans do not show until the fourth inning anyway. Do not get disheartened if you get kicked out by the real owner. Just pretend to be confused and act like my Tia Chicha trying to set up a DVR. Then be brazen and try to slide into Row F.

Mas…Play ball! Five tips to survive Los Doyers 2013

Powerball lottery winner Pedro Quezada plans to help the needy

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(PNS reporting from NEW YERSEY) Pedro Quezada, the Garden State bodega owner who won Saturday’s $338 million Powerball jackpot, says his old life of selling Flamin’Hot Cheetos and malt liquor is all behind him now and he now plans a future helping those in need.

The Dominican immigrant, who purchased the lottery ticket at Eagle Liquor in Passaic, didn’t know the store had sold the lucky ducat or that he was the big winner when he went to check, he told PNS in an interview Thursday.

“When they looked, the clerk at the counter told me congratulations,” Quezada said. “Then he said we were cousins, even though he is a Hindu gentleman.” 

Mas…Powerball lottery winner Pedro Quezada plans to help the needy

I’m not that all that into marriage, but I support marriage equality

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I was at a party the other night when a group of women asked me how long I’ve been with my boyfriend. Oh boy.

I told them six years and braced myself for the onslaught of “WHY AREN’T YOU MARRIED! HE NEEDS TO GIVE YOU A RING! BLABLABLABLA” and so on and so forth.

As a woman who consciously chooses not to get married, I’m constantly dealing with this sort of thing. People just don’t understand why.

Is my boyfriend a commitment-phobe? Are we swingers? Are we not serious? Never are we thought of as a happy stable couple content to just enjoy each other’s company.

No, something must be wrong with us.

Mas…I’m not that all that into marriage, but I support marriage equality

PNS*Hot*Flash: Sheriff Joe ‘damn sure’ Pope Francis is Latino

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(PNS reporting from PHOENIX) The media may question the newly-elected pontiff’s ethnicity, but Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio firmly believes that Pope Francis is Latino.

“His real name is Jorge and he speaks Spanish. I’m damn sure he is a Latino; he’s probably a Mexican, ” Arpaio told the monthly breakfast meeting of the Sons of the Arizona Indian Wars Wednesday.

Mas…PNS*Hot*Flash: Sheriff Joe ‘damn sure’ Pope Francis is Latino

GOP marks ‘Decade of the Dominican’ after immigrant’s Powerball win

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(PNS reporting from NEW YERSEY) Literally hours after Dominican immigrant Pedro Quezada won the $338 million New Jersey Powerball jackpot Saturday, the Republican Party announced that the years 2013-2023 will be known as the Decade of the Dominican.

The news was met with universal cynicism, and is seen as the latest in a series of floundering attempts by the party to attract new minority members to its ranks.

“We are really thrilled for Mr. Quezada, as this is the first time in years a Dominican in New Jersey has raised his hands over his head without being surrounded by police,” said African-American GOP spokesman Sam Beau.

“Plus, the fact that he is named ‘Pedro’ makes it easier for us to remember his name.”

Mas…GOP marks ‘Decade of the Dominican’ after immigrant’s Powerball win

Pee-powered urinal game consoles make splash at Coca-Cola Park

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(PNS reporting from ALLENTOWN) If you’re a fan of the baseball minor league IronPigs in Pennsylvania’s Lehigh Valley, urine luck next time you catch a home game at Coca-Cola Park in Allentown.

The urinals in the men’s rooms at the stadium now feature pee-powered video game consoles where writing your name as a high scorer is just a zip away.

WPVI Channel 6 Action News in nearby Philadelphia explains:

The screen above the urinal goes into game mode when the user approaches. The games, including alpine skiing, monitor the user’s aim to test their agility and knowledge.

Users will receive their score upon completion, which officials say is an average of over 55 seconds.

Users with high scores will be happy to know that they will be displayed in real-time across various videoboard displays within Coca-Cola Park.

Mas…Pee-powered urinal game consoles make splash at Coca-Cola Park

He starts out sketchy, then he turns into ‘Quite A Character’ (video)

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“This is my draw…. Is a rebel guy that want to be a real portrait, and not a cartoon, but I don’t listen his petition, I only play with him and I bother him. Then my character avenge. | Éste es mi dibujo…. Es un chico rebelde que quiere ser un retrato real, y no una caricatura, pero yo no escucho su petición, solo juego con él y lo molesto. Luego mi personaje se venga.”
— Neyra Reyes

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