Ask A Mexican: Why do Mexicans hate yellow cheese so much? (video)

mexicheeseWhen POCHO’s Associate Naranjero, the esteemed Gustavo ¡Ask A Mexican! Arellano, watched the video of BuzzFeed feeding Taco Bell to actual Mexicans (photo), he knew he needed to set the record straight regarding the yellow cheese that tops lots of Mexican-American food. Because queso, k no? Yellow cheese, says Gus, has an honorable history — and pocho cred. Also, BuzzFeed, FYI: Burritos, white rice and flour tortillas ARE “Mexican food,” doh!

Gus wrote the book, you know. Literally. It’s called TACO USA (How Mexican Food Conquered America).  

And now, prepare your device and your mind will follow.

Why do Mexicans hate yellow cheese so much? (the video)

Mas…Ask A Mexican: Why do Mexicans hate yellow cheese so much? (video)

Watch: BuzzFeed serves Taco Bell to L.A. Mexicans + @RoValderrama

mexicansattacobellWhen BuzzFeed served some Taco Bell specialties to L.A. Mexicans, reactions were — let us say — mixed. We know it’s L.A. because they mention King Taco in East Los. Try it, you’ll like it. We also recommend Guisado on Cesar Chavez. And Eastside Luv right by Mariachi Plaza offers a great selection of refreshing beverages for an 80°March day like today.

Mas…Watch: BuzzFeed serves Taco Bell to L.A. Mexicans + @RoValderrama

Taco Bell plans poetry-grilled ‘Verso-Quesarito-Burrito’

elpoetryburrito(PNS reporting from CHICAGO) Cheesy burrito fans and hashtag activists, your prayers have been answered! Taco Bell will debut a new menu item Monday – the Verso-Quesarito-Burrito, a burrito wrapped in a quesadilla with Mexican poetry written on the tortilla.

The VQB is a ground “beef” burrito with rice, chipotle sauce and reduced-fat sour cream in a grilled quesadilla full of melted American cheese.

You can also order the quesadilla-burrito hybrid with shredded chicken or steak. As an added bonus, the Verso-Quesarito-Burrito will feature poems written on the tortilla by Mexican day laborers. They’ll be versifying using only gluten-free ink, of course (photo.)

Mas…Taco Bell plans poetry-grilled ‘Verso-Quesarito-Burrito’

Taco Bell reveals secret 12% ingredients in 88% ‘beef’ tacos

dogeingredientsIt’s not news that the “beef” in Taco Bell’s “beef” tacos was only 88% actual “beef.” POCHO amigo Gustavo Arellano was all over that years ago. But wassup with the other 12%?

The mystery ended Tuesday as the fast-food chain came clean about the secret ingredients which the company says are all “completely safe and approved by the FDA.”

“They do have weird names,” Taco Bell wrote on its website, ”perfect for tongue twisters!…They’re common ingredients also found in food items at your grocery store.”

As a public service, we’re happy to present the complete list, as if any of you pochos go to Taco Bell at all:

Mas…Taco Bell reveals secret 12% ingredients in 88% ‘beef’ tacos

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Valentine’s Day Hot Salsa Blind Tasting Test

nolabelsalsaHola. Is Tia Lencha here. Happy Valemtines Day!

I haf the perfect parry idea. What is red and espicy and uses a blindfold? Get jur mind out of the basura (thas trash for you pochos.) Is the Valentimes Hot Sauce Taste Test. This is one test that is fun to estudy for!

What is it? Ju put numbers on little paper cups and then little bit of each of jur favorite hot sauces in the little paper cups. Ju can use Tapatio, Cholula, Bufalo, Red Rooster, what ever ju like. Then ju put a handkerchief to cover someone’s eyes and they taste. They try to guess which hot sauce is in each little cup. Fun, no?

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Valentine’s Day Hot Salsa Blind Tasting Test

MADDEF rates 2013 a ‘Mestizo Year’ for Chihuahuas in media, online

brains(PNS reporting from BEVERLY HILLS) 2013 was a “Mestizo Year” for Chihuahuas in the media, according to the Mexican American Dog Defense and Education Fund’s (MADDEF) annual It’s A Dog’s Life report released here Monday.

The study carefully tallies and grades Chihuahua representations in pop culture (TV, radio, Internets, books, newspapers, magazines, videos, pop music, video games, etc.), scientifically sniffing the butt of America’s complicated relationship with the popular canine.

2013’s record was mixed, the group lamented, and the prospect of increased levels of anti-Chihuahua defamation in 2014 “remains troubling, especially in cyberspace, where mocking the perritos has become a viral ‘meme.'”

Since the death of superstar Gidget the Taco Bell Chihuahua in 2006, the image of all Chihuahuas has been on the decline, the study noted, presenting this widely-circulated and ignorantly-misspeeled illustration of an alleged “zombie” Chihuahua as just one piece of evidence (photo, right.)

Mas…MADDEF rates 2013 a ‘Mestizo Year’ for Chihuahuas in media, online

Visionary behind Doritos Locos Tacos dies at 41 (photos + video)

toddtacosTodd Mills, who came up with the idea for Doritos Locos Tacos, lost his battle with cancer on Thanksgiving. The Little Rock, Arkansas father of two was 41 (photo, above.)

USA Today reports:

Mills started the Facebook page “Taco Shells from Doritos Movement” in 2009, encouraging followers to “tell Frito-Lay that we demand nacho cheesy taco shells!”

On the page, Mills posted photoshopped images of well known figures including Albert Einstein with a cheesy taco shell in a thought bubble, Steve Jobs holding a Macbook with a cheesy taco shell on the screen and Chuck Norris doing a karate kick while holding a cheesy taco shell….

Mas…Visionary behind Doritos Locos Tacos dies at 41 (photos + video)

Breaking: Chef Rick Bayless invents ultimate hangover cure

7upbaby640(PNS reporting from CHICAGO) Black coffee, menudo, In-N-Out, mota, maybe even a little hair of the dog — all common hangover remedies, right? But according to a study from Mexican culinary genius Rick Bayless, a new discovery might have them all beat: 7-Up.

“People have helplessly suffered hangovers forever and without any kind of cure. Well, I have discovered the single greatest hangover cure of all-time and can back it up with scientific evidence. No one has ever thought of this before…it’s 7-Up, my friends. You’re welcome!” Bayless told PNS.

Mas…Breaking: Chef Rick Bayless invents ultimate hangover cure

It’s National Taco Day! Eat ’em if you got ’em

streettacosAccording to either the National Taco Industry Council, or some drunk person who also just made this up, today is National Taco Day in the United Estates.

And it says so, on to the online hub of this holiday, NationalTacoDay.com:

In 2012, Americans ate 4.5 billion tacos! 
That’s 490,000 miles of tacos, which could take you to the moon and back or, if you prefer, could, at 775-million pounds, equal the weight of two Empire State Buildings.

Damn, that just makes me feel fat. Also on their site, they state oddly that:

Mas…It’s National Taco Day! Eat ’em if you got ’em

Breaking: Actor Jesse Borrego to unveil new salsa

chingasalsa(PNS reporting from TAMPA) Chicano actor Jesse Borrego, famous for Blood In, Blood Out, is set to unveil a new salsa that he says will “light a fire under your ass!”

The salsa, named “Chinga Tu Madre!” will be sold in cans only and is slated for release this September by the Rick Bayless Division of Frito Lay.

Borrego invited PNS to sample some of the salsa Tuesday at what he calls his “private office.”

Mas…Breaking: Actor Jesse Borrego to unveil new salsa

Breaking: Taco Bell unveils new Rick Bayless-inspired burritos

bigbeefycrunch(PNS reporting from ALAMEDA) If the Doritos Locos Tacos from Taco Bell are not satisfying your diarrheal needs, don’t worry!

The chain is introducing a chef Rick Bayless-inspired burrito that features Flamin’ Hot Fritos corn chips as a summer-only item until early August.

The burrito, which will retail for 99 cents, has rice, warm nacho cheese, beef, sour cream, and Flamin’ Hot Fritos corn chips cultivated by Bayless himself, deep in the villages of Oaxaca.

Mas…Breaking: Taco Bell unveils new Rick Bayless-inspired burritos

Pocho Ocho absolutely worst things to do with a Taco Bell burrito

Eric Brown, 36, of Pt. Lucie, FL, is awaiting an arraignment for “assault” because he allegedly threw a Taco Bell burrito in his 16-year-old brother-in-law’s face.

Just so you don’t run afoul of the Law of Burritos, make note of the pocho ocho things you should never EVER do with a Taco Bell burrito:

8. Smoosh it in a 16-year-old’s face

7. Use it as a suppository

6. Mix with papier mache to make a piñata

Mas…Pocho Ocho absolutely worst things to do with a Taco Bell burrito